today's scare

B escaped today. The padlock on our front door wasn't fully secured, so while I was in the bathroom this morning he managed to take it off, and run down to the major street that is 5 houses away. I walk out of the bathroom and see A standing by the open front door laughing. That's the giveaway. I look outside, no B in sight. Walk out to the driveway, there he is heading towards traffic filled street, full speed ahead. I run after him, shouting for him to stop. I kick off my slippers, which are slowing me down. I still can't catch up to him, he's getting further away. Turned the corner. Still on the sidewalk, heading for the intersection with the traffic light. Suddenly, he stops in front of the apartment complex on the corner, and heaves the padlock over the fence, towards the swimming pool. I'm close now, and he stays still. Lets me grab him. Knows he pushed the envelop a bit too far. We walk back to the house, iron grip the whole way. Sit down on the couch for an 8 minute time out. I tell him it's not ok to leave the house without mami; he has to stop when I say stop. Say "I'm sorry Mami" ... "Um muma mumi" "B, you need to be a good boy" "Guh buh".

I need to figure out how to get protective care services for that kid, before tragedy strikes for real.

Hair Pulling

I've been thinking alot about the expression "pulling my hair out". It's the kind of thing one would say when frustrated, when one can't quite get it right even though one is trying hard. I wonder if that is what A is feeling, since he's now pulled out a 2 inch x 1 inch triangular segment of his hair, on his left side (he is a lefty). Although honestly at this point I see him do it as a stim, unconsciously, not at moments of peak frustration (and relatively speaking, he tends to be less frustrated than his close relatives). Having him wear gloves helps. Except at meal time, when that gets messy. Although I had him wear a rubber glove at dinner last night, when he started pulling out his hair. Such a sweet kid, he always asks permission before taking the glove off. So today, T took A (and G) for haircuts. We are hoping that the less hair he has, the less he'll pull at it. We'll see. I thought that the bald patch would be less noticeable with really short hair, but I was wrong. G looks really cute with his haircut, but he doesn't like it, he thinks it's too short.

Peas Update

Another first for B: this morning, he was eating his crunchy peas from a little plastic bag (the plastic box they came in has long since moved on). After he was all ready for the schoolbus to arrive, he picked up his snack bag, and put it in his backpack himself! He has never taken this kind of initiative, to pack a treat for himself to have for later.

whirled peas

Last night, B ate a "vegetable" voluntarily for the first time ever. I have to put the word in quotation marks because they are those dried, salted peas that come in a plastic box and probably have no nutritional value whatsoever. Nonetheless, I felt it deserved documentation. BTW, he likes the plastic box MORE than the peas themselves, but he still does pop the peas in his mouth. Salty and crunchy, and slightly resembling the texture of sand pebbles dissolving in the mouth (which he adores!).

a bit of wisdom from my comadre

mistakes are perfection

worried

I'm a little worried about A. He is really slow and spacey and stimmy. And stressed out. And we are stressing him out more when we try to get him to hurry up. It's getting harder now that school has started up again, and he can no longer spend 2 hours eating breakfast. I'm not sure what to do. Any suggestions?

High School

We've almost completed the high school registration process for G, and he should be starting classes on Monday. Our biggest obstacle is proving that he has already had chicken pox so he doesn't have to get an unnecessary vaccine. G is nervous, but like the guidance counseler says, every day will be better than the first day.

Loving Kindness

I almost forgot to document my one and only New Years Resolution for 2008. Practice loving kindness. All the time. Towards all.

Happy New Year!

We've been having a great stay-at-home vacation this year. Stay-at-home in the sense that we didn't go out of town. We've been going places every day, today A, G and I went to J-town for lunch with A and B's godmother. A loved the fountains with multiple sources of water flowing over different sized rocks. G loved the Japanese videos and mangas. I loved seeing my comadre and feeling like a family. I'm not quite sure why having G with us makes us feel more like a family. Well, (I guess this is exactly the kind of reflection that blogging is destined to inspire) I suppose it makes a huge difference to have an offspring who is not moderately to severely affected by autism. Someone to show things to, share things with, hang out with, interact with. Usually when I am out with my boys I am holding a one-ended conversation, a running commentary of what we are doing and seeing, and what will come next. It's nice, for a change, to have someone comment back, ask a question, offer a suggestion. And I love the way G interacts with A and B. He is loving and accepting, nonjudgmental. (Or at least smart enough to keep any negative comments a long way from my ears. But I really think I'm right about the nonjudgmental part.) And it is really nice to have an extra person in the house - I find that I check myself more frequently and don't yell as much at the boys, and for that I am grateful. And very happy. Yeah, I am very happy. I hope you are too. Happy New Year.