Out to lunch

My family went out to lunch today. All four of us. After esoccer. To a restaurant that does not sport golden arches. We ate frenchfries (A) and Steak (B) and generally behaved very well. No scenes. We all got to finish our meals. We weren't the ones feeding the ducks, but we enjoyed watching them run after the bread that the neighboring diners were throwing to them.

Ah, small miracles.

Gilberto Gil

Wow, what an amazing concert on Wed. night! So spiritual, moving, touched me deep to my soul. Made me consider culture in a whole new way. Powerful messages with equally powerful delivery.

Failure

I had the opportunity to look failure in the face this past week. Tore part of my soul out I believe. Raised a lot of issues for me regarding ethics, value, communication, and ability. In the end I was able to conclude that I hadn't really failed. Or at least that the failure wasn't 100% attributable to me. But in the process I self-learned that I have A LOT of issues with my own failure. I have a really hard time accepting the fact that I may not be successful in something that I attempt. That I may fail in something that I attempt and try really hard to achieve. I may fail even though I try my best. That terrifies me. I may fail even though I try my best. I think that is the heart of my terror. I think that is a lesson that I really need to learn. That even though I try my best I may fail. And that's ok.

balance

i think i need to spend less time worried and stressed out over my children's futures and more time enjoying the present moment with them.

super stress

super stressed out by work right now. specifically with a miscommunication, probably series of miscommunications, with a colleague who i am charged with supervising. we spend a lot of time describing the two different sides of the same coin without agreeing that we are both looking at the same coin. things came to a head on friday afternoon -- i'm not 100% sure how we came to 2 very different conclusions at the end of the same conversation -- and i think she may be ready to resign. this is exactly the sort of thing that triggers my stress levels and keeps me up at 3am in tears and frustration. not exactly a healthy response.

proud

B is snuggled up on the couch with his papa right now, both are watching the featherweight boxing tournament of the Caribbean. Both equally absorbed. A already brushed his teeth and went to bed when it became clear that he lost the Thomas v Boxing battle.

A wrote his name by himself yesterday. He was doing his homework, letter coyping worksheets, and I asked him to write his name without giving him any visual prompts. Just, write your name x x x x. And he did. Beautifully. I'm so proud.

Question

If our children were to find life partners one day, wouldn't we want their life partner to understand and accomodate their disabilities instead of getting so frustrated by them and/or resenting the manifestations of the disabilities?

So why then do I find it so hard to do the same with my partner?

*** The only person I can ever change is myself***

migraine headaches

possible triggers:
* alcohol
* stress at work
* not enough sleep
* stress at home
* not eating well
* combination of stress at home and work
* not drinking enough water
* not taking enough time for myself
* stress

things i need to do

1. Get A new eyeglasses
2. Make dentist appointments for both boys and myself
3. pay bills
4. do taxes.
5. figure out next ieps
6. review home program notebooks
7. wash kitchen floor
8. get a massage